When a relationship breaks, individuals often feel lost and alone, they seek to find a solution from different sources but hardly get one. As the internet has already turned this big world into a global village, the easy availability of an online support system is pushing the ones looking for relief from their anguish towards asking social media for help. One of the significant sources of inspiration to the younger generation is YouTube.
Author of The Break Up Handbook, Mehran Dadbeh has thousands of subscribers and followers on YouTube who like to listen and share their distress with him. As he is doing it for a long time now, there's no one else who could shed light on this topic better than him.
Recently, an Australian reporter Hailee Walker interviewed Mr. Mehran Dadbeh to understand his idea behind solving major relationship issues via digital communication and this is what he had to say.
Have a look at the Q&A!
Mehran shares "I had gone through several breakups and relationship issues when I was younger, and every time my son broke up with his girlfriend I knew what he must be feeling terrible and how painful the experience must be."
"Whether it's a puppy love (which happens in high school) or a serious one when we understand its real meaning, the horrible feeling is not limited to a specific age, and I wanted nothing more than to be able to help clear and make some sense of it all for my son," Mehran adds further.
Mehran's words indeed helped his son get over his breakup, and that's when he thought that there must be millions of people out there going through the same difficult times in their relationship.
A lot of people interact with Mehran on YouTube every day, and he also receives hundreds of emails from people around the world. When asked what does he think about this interaction?
Mehran responds in his unique, humble ways, "Often the advice they get on Internet sites or YouTube is, in short, capsule-size forms.It seems helpful on the surface, but, since these sources have no in-depth understanding of the person's psyche, they are left with an incomplete understanding of what goes on and how they feel."
The author says that one thing which is usually common among all his interaction with people is they all want to know why what happened, happened! Why someone who promised to be with them forever suddenly left, how it reflects on their character, how they've lost confidence in themselves, and most importantly, how to move on?
People want everything quick and fast, even when it comes to relationship remedies. They seek immediate answers to their questions from someone who has been through the same. So they trust the one who has faced all of this and shared his experience.
Mehran shares, "when you want to quench someone's hunger, then it is better you give them a whole sandwich rather than giving them a bite."
He adds further, "I like to give people the whole understanding of their psyche, mechanism, and scenario which they have in front of them. For this, I make as long videos as possible, I also interact on Facebook, and have an official site as well where I often go live for relationship webinars."
Breakups are always a blessing in disguise, says Mehran.
He says, "Breakups are a chance for enlightenment, further development, to become wiser and more worldly, and certainly a gateway to more power to withstand the challenges of the future! If used properly and learned from wisely, it will serve as a great catapult to propel one to overcome obstacles and become better at interaction with life, it paves the road to better and happier times!"
Mehran reveals, "Life cannot be summed up in one woman or man, or one relationship. Life has a lot more to offer. We all have the same needs and shortcomings, so focus on what your ex was providing which made her/him so desired. When you focus on it you will see that what you are missing right now could have been available from millions of others. Whatever this relationship was, you were the creator of it," reports The Big Smoke.
Closure can be achieved by simple communication and recap of the relationship in a civilized manner. Most importantly, a closure should never be dependent on your partner. You, yourself are enough to do it with the help of truth and facts!
A closure is never in hand of another person, do not seek their approval.
If he could offer one peice of advice to people, what would it be? And he replied by stating: "It is not the end of the world, life cannot be summed up in one woman or man, or one relationship. Life has a lot more to offer than you can imagine – much more than a partner who does not want you! No-one is a god, we all have the same needs and shortcomings, so believe that you are worth no less than anyone else and focus on what your ex was providing which made her/him so desired."
He adds further, "Whatever this relationship was, you were the creator of it, and given another opportunity, you can create another relationship just as warm and wonderful, if not better, due to your added wisdom and experience from this past one. So now go and build it with another one, as you are the main ingredient in this."
If you are trying to navigate your way through the emotional minefields of a breakup and have some questions in your heart, then you can always connect with Mehran Dadbeh on YouTube, Facebook and on his official site.
That's all, folks!